"A fact is a simple statement that everyone believes. It is innocent, unless found guilty. A hypothesis is a novel suggestion that no one wants to believe. It is guilty, until found effective."

"We should have had socialism already, but for the socialists."

"What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives travelling twice as fast as stagecoaches?"

"No flying machine will ever fly from New York to Paris ... [because] no known motor can run at the requisite speed for four days without stopping."

"Inventions reached their limit long ago, and I see no hope for further development."

"When one is trying to do something beyond his known powers it is useless to seek the approval of friends. Friends are at their best in moments of defeat."

"The friendly cow all red and white, I love with all my heart: She gives me cream with all her might; to eat with apple tart."

"After several minutes of utterly dull conversation I began to think of her not as a woman but as a human, then not as a human but as an animal, then not as an animal but as a source of high-grade protein."

"It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years."

"It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow."

"There is as much difference between us and ourselves as there is between us and others."

"Where is human nature so weak as in the bookstore?"

"Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee."

"Truth, springs from agrument amongst friends."

"Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying as an income tax refund."

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax."

"Any impatient student of mathematics or science or engineering who is irked by having algebraic symbolism thrust upon him should try to get along without it for a week."

"Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it."